Always Be My Baby
by whitters23
Summary: A series of vignettes revolving around the love square. Right now mostly Finn/Quinn-centric but will eventually involve Quinn/Puck, Finn/Rachel and Puck/Rachel. Rated T just to be safe. Likely to end in Puck/Rachel & Finn/Quinn but we will see...
1. That Familiar Finn Hudson Smell

**Disclaimer: I do not own the show Glee or any of the characters belonging to it. They all belong to Fox and Ryan Murphy.**

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_That Familiar Finn Hudson Smell_

Quinn snapped up, her heart pounding in her ears and her pyjama top soaked through with sweat. For the past few weeks she'd been having some pretty crazy dreams. Occasionally they were fiery and passionate, but most of the time she suffered from horrible nightmares. Tonight's dream was yet another very vivid version of the latter.

She blinked through the darkness. For a brief moment she'd forgotten where she was, but as her eyes adjusted, the shapes of Finn's living room started to reappear from the shadows. She let out a small sigh of relief when she realized she wasn't still trapped in her own nightmare. As she looked around the living room she saw that the clock on the DVD player read 2:00am. Groaning she flopped her head back down onto the sofa bed.

At first Finn had insisted she sleep in his bed, an idea that she instantly rejected, not wanting to be anymore trouble than she already was. In the end she lost that battle to Finn. A rare occurrence in itself. When she came downstairs after brushing her teeth, there he was already settled into the pullout bed. He laid there smirking up at her, obviously pleased with his cleverness, and offered her a "sleep tight". In return he received one of her signature death glares, but as she walked back up to his room she found she was actually relieved to have lost that battle. After the night they'd been through at her parent's house she was more than happy to get a good nights rest. His bed smelled like him. Crisp and clean, like freshly washed clothes and an autumn breeze. She sunk her head down into the fluffy pillow pulling the comforter right up to her chin as she did so, and before she knew it all her worries and stress from the day's events dissappeared. She slept in his bed for the first week, comforted by his cowboy wallpaper and the cramped cosiness of his room, knowing he didn't mind sleeping on the sofa bed because Finn had always been able to sleep anywhere. She had even seen him fall asleep at his drum set once. However, when it looked like she might become a permanent fixture in the Hudson home she started to feel guilty about commandeering his bed every night. So they decided to alternate every other night with the exception of game nights which Quinn insisted he take the bed regardless of their schedule. This plan worked well for them and Quinn was surprised that they had been able to work out the compromise without her biting his head off. Honestly, it may have been a first for them.

She laid there for a moment, listening to the sound of her own breathing and wishing that the gentle ins and outs of her breath would sweep her off to a kinder dreamland for a change. After what seemed like an eternity she let out an audible sigh and sat up to have another look at the little orange clock on the DVD player. 2:14am glowed back at her in what she decided was a taunting manner. Exasperated, Quinn flung the blankets back and made her way up the stairs. At first she decided on going to the bathroom to splash some water on her face but as she reached the bathroom door she faltered and changed her course. Finding herself standing in front of the closed door at the end of the hallway, instead. Behind this door she could hear the muffled noise of Finn's snoring. Hesitantly she opened the door, hoping it wouldn't creak like everything else in the house. She slid through the opening and softly shut the door behind her.

Up until that moment she hadn't given any real thought to what she would do once she was actually in his room. Peering at Finn's sleeping form she made up her mind to at least wake him up, so she slowly padded over to the side of his bed. She knelt down and gazed at his sleeping face, smiling at his childlike expression. Brushing his forearm with the back of her fingers she tried to wake him up gently. This of course didn't work, so she nudged him a little. His expression changed for a quick moment before he let out a loud snort. Quinn just barely held back her laughter and when he didn't wake she resorted to poking him hard in the shoulder.

His eyes fluttered open in confusion and he stammered, "Quinn? Is something wrong?", his voice tired and hoarse.

"Shhhh, it's ok. I just had a bad dream".

Propping himself up with one elbow and wiping the sleep from his eyes, he shifted over a little and lifted the blankets, motioning for her to join him.

"Are you sure?! What will your mom say?", she asked surprised by his offer.

He stared back at her blankly. He hadn't really thought about the implications of his offer, it was just a natural reaction to hearing she had a bad dream. It was something that his mom had always done when he was just a little boy.

"Sure, if you want. I mean, I don't think Mom would approve, but really what's the worst that could happen, right? You're already pregnant". This last word he said while stifling a yawn. She smiled and slipped into bed with him.

This was new. She had never shared a bed with a boy before. Ever! Even the night she had gotten pregnant it was in the cab of Puck's truck. This was unknown territory for her. She giggled a little at the strangeness of her situation.

"What's so funny?" Finn asked tired but intrigued.

"Oh, it's just funny that this is so new to me. Here I am pregnant and this is my first time in bed with a man. How ridiculous is that?", she said, humour evident in her voice. He couldn't help but chuckle at this.

"It's new to me too…but I think I like it" he joked while wiggling his eyebrows up and down and tickling the bottoms of her feet with his toes.

She let out a squeal at his touch and immediately her hand flew to her mouth, eyes widening at the thought that his mom might have heard.

"Finn, you idiot!" she hissed in a mock angry tone, but she couldn't keep a straight face for long once she caught a glimpse of the lazy grin he had plastered on his face.

He turned on his side, and wrapping his arm around her he pulled her in close. And there it was, that familiar Finn Hudson smell that made her feel so safe and secure. She loved that he somehow managed to smell warm and crisp and cool all at the same time. She smiled into the pillow at this amazing phenomenon, which was probably just the result of something as simple as the combination of the soap and after shave he used, and almost didn't hear him when he asked her what her dream was about.

"The baby", she answered quietly. "It's always about the baby".

"Well you're both safe now", he reassured, his voice muffled by her shoulder. Reaching his hand over to her rounded belly he lazily rubbed it with his thumb.

"I love you" he mumbled as he drifted back to sleep, and she knew it was true. Maybe it won't always be that way, but at that moment it was real, and for that moment it was good enough.

She wrapped her own hand around the one he had resting on her belly.

"I love you too", she breathed.

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**AN: This is my first fanfic. Would love to know what you thought. Reviews are highly appreciated and any advice or constructive criticism is always welcome. **

**(If you notice some things are different its because I've edited it again after noticing a few mistakes and while I fixed those I made a few (very) minor adjustments to make things flow a little better. It's funny that you can edit something 20 times and still manage to miss things! If you come across any other typos please message me them. Thanks!)**


	2. To Be A Grown Up

**AN: First, thanks to those that reviewed. I'm so happy you liked my first chapter! Also, I am amazed that people have added this story to their favourites and alerts list. You are all wonderful!  
So for this chapter I t****hought I'd give you some Carole/Quinn moments. I wish we got to see some on the show. Also, this chapter changes POVs quite a bit between Quinn, Finn and even Carole. Hopefully I didn't make it too confusing.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee! Sadly...**

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_To Be A Grown Up_

Quinn awoke to a slight tickle on her hip where it seemed her pyjama top had risen during the night. She blinked in confusion at the wall of heat she felt behind her. Looking over her shoulder she saw Finn, his heavy hand resting on her side where his fingers were twitching as he slept.

Since the first night Quinn had snuck up to sleep with Finn, it had become a part of their regular routine. Every night when it was her turn on the sofa bed she would feign sleep until she knew his mother had gone to bed. She'd wait an extra 15 minutes just to be safe before she snuck upstairs, pillow in hand. She wasn't sure why she kept up the appearance that she was sleeping downstairs. Maybe she was trying to ease her own Christian conscience instead of trying to appease his mom, Carole. She was sure Carole knew what was going on anyways, as Quinn never made a point of being back in the living room for the morning. But it was never brought up and she liked it that way.

Finn's mom probably thought they were sneaking around for sexual purposes and kept quiet about it because she had already come to terms with the fact that they'd been having sex. In reality their motives were purely innocent, Quinn longing for some security, and Finn, well she was sure he just liked being able to help in any way possible, to be able to make one thing right in her life when so many others were wrong.

Finn seemed to like this arrangement too. The second time she'd snuck into his room he was surprised. Concern etched across his face he asked if she'd had another bad dream. When she said 'no' and climbed into bed anyways he looked extremely confused but went along with it. Now he had come to expect it. Often she would sneak into the room to find him laying there wide awake and staring at the ceiling, waiting for her arrival.

However, this was the first time she had awoken to find that Finn had snuck up to sleep with her. She imagined he had tried on several occasions but being too nervous with his mom just down the hall he was unable to follow through. Although on the other hand, Quinn thought it was much more likely that he would just actually fall asleep while he was pretending.

Shifting in their tight quarters she turned to face him. He looked so peaceful. For a moment it was hard to believe that he led a life any different than that of a normal teenage boy. His only struggles should be peer pressure, football plays and beating whatever X-Box game he was playing that week. Instead, he was coping with a hormonal live-in girlfriend, struggling to pay for expensive doctors bills and the stress of soon becoming a father, bearing a load that isn't even his. A wave of guilt washed over her as she watched him sleep. Quinn glanced at the clock behind her and saw that it was almost 6:30am. Way too early for a Saturday but she was wide awake. She softly kissed the tip of his slightly freckled nose and watched as his eyebrows reacted to her touch. Deciding he looked too peaceful to wake she slipped out of bed and made her way to the bathroom to get ready for the day.

xoxoxoxoxoxxo

When Quinn went downstairs she saw the sofa bed had already been closed up and Carole was sitting at the kitchen table finishing up a cup of coffee while she wrote out a shopping list. Quinn had quickly learned that Carole was an early riser, saying she got more done between 6-8am than most people got done all day. Quinn supposed it was a habit she had formed when they lost Finn's father, trying to fit in as much as she could between her crazy work schedules. Carole looked up when Quinn walked into the kitchen.

"Morning honey, have a good sleep?"

Quinn smiled and nodded.

"Good. I'm actually just about to head to the grocery store, the fridge was starting to look a little bare. But there's still enough of the essentials if you wanted to fix yourself up something for breakfast." Carole placed her cup in the dishwasher before she headed to the front closet for her jacket and shoes.

"Oh, Quinn, I wanted to ask you how you were on prenatal vitamins. I can pick some up while I'm out if you'd like"

"Actually, I am running pretty low… But you don't have to do that."

"Don't be silly, I'm the Grandma, that's my job", she replied back with a smile.

Quinn just nodded in acceptance, still finding herself shy in front of Carole. Maybe it was because she wasn't used to adults that were so kind and generous and accepting of someone in her predicament… or maybe it had something to do with the massive lie she was telling and the fact that this woman was doing so much for her because of it. Once again, she tried not to think about that.

"Ok, well I should be back in an hour or two, I have some other errands to do too. Just let Finn know I've gone out when he wakes up. And remind him that he still hasn't taken that garbage out like I asked."

Quinn nodded again, blushing at the mention of Finn still sleeping, since he was obviously not in the bed that he'd started in.

"Alright see you in a bit", she tossed over her shoulder, pretending not to notice the embarrassment on the young girl's face.

_Well… shit. So much for it never coming up._

_xoxoxoxoxo_

That night, as Finn helped Quinn get the pull-out ready they noticed the sheets had been removed. Quinn looked at him with wide eyes.

"Umm, I'm going to get ready", she said and then gave him a very pointed look that clearly meant go figure this out, NOW. He just nodded blankly.

"Hey Mom… How come there are no sheets on the sofa bed?" Finn called from the living room.

"They're being washed, honey!" she answered from the kitchen where she was emptying the dishwasher.

"Umm, you forgot to put new ones on, do we have any more", he said as he made his way over to her.

"No I didn't", she replied, cheerfully placing a handful of forks in the cutlery drawer. "And no we don't, well none that fit the sofa bed anyways."

"Uhhh… well where is Quinn supposed to sleep?" he asked a little puzzled.

His mom didn't say a word, she just fixed him with a knowing gaze and a smirk.

And then it clicked. Quinn was right, she had definitely figured things out.

"Oh… Well, uh, goodnight", he murmured and leaned over to give her a quick peck on the cheek.

"Night Finn".

Finn started to make his way out of the kitchen to fold up the sofa bed, but stopped and looked back at his mom a little hesitant.

"Uh, mom? Are you sure you're ok with this? I feel kinda weird about it."

Carole looked up at her son a little surprised. Was he seriously asking for her permission after all of their sneaking around?

"Yes, I'm sure Finn. Am I sad that my little man has had to grow up so much in such a short period of time? Yes, but you guys are having a baby together, and that means I'm going to have to accept the fact that you're an adult now and start treating you like one. I think we can all handle this maturely. I can respect that you want to spend the night with the mother of your child. I tell you what though, if it will make you feel better, why don't you set up a sleeping bag in your room. That way you can keep pretending that I don't know what's going on and I won't have to keep rearranging the living room every morning. Then everyone wins", she offered, smiling softly at her son's innocence.

"Ok, cool. Thanks Mom", Finn breathed, relieved that his mom was so understanding.

"No problem Finn", she said as he turned to leave again.

"Oh, honey", she called out to him. "Just make sure to lock the door when you want to some 'alone' time, ok?"

Finn flushed at his mother's not so subtle sexual reference and he quickly fled the kitchen before the conversation got worse. One sex talk in his life had been enough for him!

Carole stacked another plate in the cupboard, chuckling under her breathe as she did so.

xoxoxoxoxo

Finn reached the top floor where Quinn was absent-mindedly brushing her hair waiting for his return.

"Well?", she asked a little anxious.

"She called us out on it. I guess she figured there was no point in setting up the bed downstairs when we all knew it wasn't being used", he stated with a lopsided grin.

She let out a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding. "So is she mad?"

"No, she's like the complete opposite. She said something about respecting our decision… to spend the night… as mature parents…" Finn drifted off not being able to recall exactly what his mom had said. "Well, she was ok with it anyways" he finished.

Quinn raised an eyebrow at the sleeping bag he held in his hand.

"A decoy" he said, motioning to the article in question. "Mom knows we won't be using it but I think it might make me feel less guilty about the situation. It feels kinda weird that my mom knows about everything and is so ok with it, you know?"

Quinn did know. Her parents had cut her out of their lives completely when they found out she was pregnant. So having a parent figure be so supportive and understanding towards their situation seemed almost…otherworldly. Perhaps that's why she loved the Hudson household so much, because it didn't belong to the Fabray world she was so used to.

xoxoxoxox

That night there was no sneaking, no feigning sleep and no secrets.

There was only him and her, guilt free.

So this is what it felt like to be a grown up.

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**AN: I had some trouble getting this chapter right... I'm still not sure if it's there yet, but I didn't know what else to do with it. Tell me what you thought. Reviews=LOVE!**

**Just a note: I decided to get rid of the "or so he thought" at the end of the "no feigning sleep and no secrets". It seemed reduntant. We all know about the lie/secret and that last part is Finn's POV so to him there are no secrets. It just seemed to take away from the story... so I took it away :)**


	3. Quiet and Sleepy Moments

**AN: Sorry it's been so long since I've posted another chapter! Believe it or not I actually have several new chapters on the go but because I'm such a perfectionist when it comes to writing it takes me FOREVER to finally stop editing. Anyways I am very happy with this chapter. It's short but sweet and I think you'll really like it. It gives me butterflies! ;) **  
**So I promise I have less sappy chapters coming but I just had to write this. I think since we don't get to see many tender F/Q moments on screen my fingers feel like I need to create some.**  
**Well enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: As always I don't own Glee or any of it's characters. If I did I wouldn't need to write this fanfic because we would be seeing it on TV! :)**

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_Quiet and Sleepy Moments_

It was a Tuesday evening and they were both sprawled out on their bed, listlessly working on their homework; binders, text books and loose papers strewn all around them. Quinn was propped up against the headboard with Finn's head nestled in her lap. The room was fairly quiet minus the rustle of papers, the scratching of her pen and Finn's absent-minded humming of Journey's _Anyway You Want It, _and Quinn was feeling pretty content.

It was these lazy moments in life, the 'throwaway' moments that people normally didn't pay any attention to, that Quinn cherished above all.

And it was then, in that quiet sleepy moment that it happened. It was swift and hard and unlike any of the other times. She had definitely just been kicked from the inside. It was certainly not the first time that she had felt the baby move. Although, usually when she felt the baby move it felt like a thousand little butterflies fluttering around in her stomach. Finn loved this comparison and had started referring to _Drizzle_ as his 'Flutterby Baby', but this was the first actual kick she had experienced.

She jumped a little at the sensation, startling Finn out of his lazy reverie.

"Finn!" she squeaked.

When he saw the shocked look on her face he sat up quickly.

"What is it? Is the baby ok?" he asked, starting to go into panic mode. The poor guy, what was he going to do once she went into labour?

"Quick!", she said, not bothering to answer him, and she moved his hand to the spot where the baby was kicking.

Finn pressed his hand on her baby bump and waited, looking both utterly scared and hopeful.

Nothing happened.

"What am I supposed to be feeling?"

"She was kicking!", she replied while rolling her eyes.

"Really?!" Finn exclaimed. He quickly added his other hand to her belly and waited to feel something.

"Yeah, but she's not doing it anymore" Quinn said looking thoroughly disappointed.

Then she had an idea. "Maybe you should try singing again…", she suggested.

While some men were sceptical or maybe even a little nervous to talk to a belly, Finn certainly wasn't. He loved the thought of _Drizzle_ being able to hear him and would often whisper things to Quinn's belly when they were lounging around on the couch. What he whispered, Quinn never knew, because he would do it so softly. Sometimes, even though it was her body he was talking to, Quinn would feel a slight pang of remorse for having intruded on such a private moment between father and daughter. Did that even make sense?

So when she suggested he sing to the baby, he didn't hesitate. He just laid back down, propping himself up so his head was level with her stomach and started singing, his hand at the ready, awaiting the first sign of movement.

"_Anyway you want it, That's the way you need it, Anyway you want it._

_She loves to laugh, She loves to sing, She does everything,_

_She loves to move, She loves to groove, She loves the…" _Finn stopped abruptly because right then the baby started kicking up a storm.

"I can feel her!" he almost whispered. "Wow…"

She looked down at him smiling at the awe and wonder on his face. A look that she hadn't seen since they first found out she was having a girl. Just when she couldn't imagine that moment getting any better, he leaned in, closing the gap between him and her baby bump and gave it a gentle kiss.

There was something special about those moments in life where all is calm and peaceful. When things just click into place easily. Where everything is serene and comfortable and any worries you once had disappeared, if only for that moment.

Quinn wished things would stay that perfect forever.

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**AN: See I told you. Short but UBER sweet! Hope you liked it. If you did (or if you didn't) let me know via the wonderous review button :)**

**Also does anyone know where I can bounce some fic ideas around... kind of like a thread for plot bunnies? Or would anyone be interested in helping with the story like I Beta reader? I'm new to writing fic so I don't know how that works but I think I might need that little extra creative help. It might help me get my new chapters up faster too... haha.**


	4. These Small Things

**AN: Another chapter! What? You thought I had given up! But I didn't... I'm just very very slow. Actually I'm glad it took me so long to do this because I wanted it to turn out just right. And so far, I think it's my favourite chapter! This is my first chapter completely from Finn's POV, so hopefully I did him justice. I think it has that teenage boy feel, lol. This chapter is really about Finn's views on Quinn.. because we really don't see a lot of that on the show (other than the HBIC Quinn). So I thought I'd try my hand at filling in some of the blanks. Hope you like it!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the magical world of Glee. These are just some of my musings on what might go on behind the curtain. :)**

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_These Small Things _

Finn likes having Quinn live with him, really he does. She always smells nice, she helps clean his room when his mom starts to get on his case and she's actually really good in the kitchen. At first he wasn't sure he would like having his moody girlfriend around _all_ the time, but the truth is he's actually grown accustomed to having her there.

Some days he even has a hard time remembering what the Hudson household was like before the pregnant teen arrived. What did his bedroom used to smell like before it adopted the faint aroma of vanilla and sunshine? What did his room even _look_ like before Quinn's frilly girly stuff had taken over? What were the conversations like before Desperate Housewives and Hugh Grant movies became the hot topic at the dinner table? It was times like these, when he thought about this stuff, that he realized just how well she fit into his little family… like she had always been a part of it. It surprised him really. She wasn't the Quinn she used to be at school, the Head Cheerleader that people adored and feared. She was herself now. The Quinn that Finn had only caught glimpses of a handful of times and usually only when she had let her guard down, but now that she didn't have to keep up appearances for the sake of her reputation…she was…well the fact was Quinn had been pretty awesome lately.

She still has her emotional outbursts every now and then but that's to be expected with a pregnant woman… or so his mom says. Regardless, Finn has noticed a significant decrease in the terms 'moron' and 'pea brain' these days. Instead she's been warm and affectionate always wanting to hold his hand and she tells him things like 'he's too good for her'. Finn _likes_ being on the receiving end of those conversations. Instead of feeling like a complete idiot he feels _needed_…like he really is the man of the house now.

He likes that they sleep together every night now, which is pretty awesome even if they never do anything more than cuddle. He likes how cute she is in the mornings, stumbling towards the bathroom with her hair a mess and eyes still closed. He likes that she hates peas as much as he does and when she picks them out of whatever they're eating she squishes them down with her fork and draws a smiley face in them. He likes that she sometimes mumbles weird things in her sleep like "_Artie's a spaceship_" or "…_but donkey's don't like jump ropes_". He likes that when she is deep in thought she bites the corner of her bottom lip and gently tugs at the ends of her hair. He likes that she shows all of her bottom teeth as well as her tops when she smiles a _real_ smile. He likes that when she eats pancakes she spreads peanut butter on them before she applies her syrup. He likes the mornings when he's lucky enough to catch her emerging from the bathroom in only her robe. Or sometimes on even luckier days she'll forget her robe in their room and come out with a towel wrapped around her instead. Those were always Finn's best days. And it wasn't even like he got to sneak a peek or anything, which would totally be awesome by the way. There was just something about the way that she'd give him that shy smile that sent his stomach somersaulting and kept him on a steady high for the rest of the day.

He likes that no matter what happens during the day there are certain things that don't change. Like in the morning, after hitting the snooze two or three times, a habit he is happy they both share, he always wakes her up with a kiss to the forehead and a "_Times up, Beautiful_" but it usually takes the warmth of his body leaving hers before she actually makes a move. Or that they always do their homework up on his bed even though its more logical to do it at the kitchen table. Or that every night when they get ready for bed she hums a little song. The song varies day to day, from jingles on the radio to a song they just rehearsed for Glee to something that Finn might have never heard before, but the humming is always a constant and it always makes him want to kiss her. Certain things like these had become predictable and reliable to Finn, like a soothing ritual. No matter what the day threw at him he could always take comfort in these small things to get him through it.

But what Finn likes most of all is how comfortable they are with each other now. Its so natural to randomly twirl a strand of her hair around his finger while they watch TV or for him to reach over and lace his fingers through hers when they drive to school. She's no longer afraid to burp in front of him, but they both laugh every time she does. She even lets him slip his hand under her shirt now when their make-out sessions get heated. He knows better than to push his luck though and limits his range to her lower back, hips and the curve of her growing belly.

There were downsides to having Quinn live with him too. There's no mistaking that. He had pretty much given up his rights to using the TV remote. He had limited time for guy stuff like playing video games or watching cool movies. She made him do his homework _everyday_. But mostly he missed the time he had for 'himself', if you catch his meaning. He couldn't even remember the last time he got to watch a late night movie on Skinamax. She was _always_ around.

Maybe guys didn't normally think about all of this stuff but he figured he wasn't really a normal teenage guy anymore. His life had changed so much this past year. From joining Glee club and befriending the kids he used to toss in dumpsters and soak with slushies to… well, to becoming a soon-to-be-father.

That's why while he was sitting there watching basketball, with a snoozing Quinn resting in his lap, he didn't mind that he had to watch it at a volume so low he needed subtitles. Things were so different from how they used to be, and he liked that. Puck could call him 'Finnessa' all he wanted, some things were bigger than having his way all the time or equal share of the TV remote or being able to watch dirty movies. And that's when he realized it was true…that he would always want things to be this way. And that just maybe when they were old enough and ready for it, they would give this baby thing another shot.

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**AN: What did you think? Review please! Next up... The truth comes out. Oh no, heartbreak alley here we come. **


	5. Not a Father, Just a Fool

**AN: Another chapter! I bet you all thought I had given up on you. I'm sorry that you have waited months for an update and all I am giving you is this tiny little chapter, but its something right? I'd like to dedicate this chapter to all my lovelies over at GleeForum who have been poking and prodding me to make another entry and also to _GalanthaDreams_ and _deli_ who's recent comments gave me that last little nudge that I needed to finish up this up. So THANKS! :D **  
**I hop you enjoy! **

**Disclaimer: As always I own nothing. :(**

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_Not a Father, Just a Fool_

It was all a lie.

Everything he had known and grown to love these past few months had been a fraud, and all Finn could do was watch as it came crashing down around him.

He wasn't really sure how he made it home after school that day. His mind was too focused on her betrayal to notice trivial things like speed limits and stop signs. It's actually a miracle that he made it home at all. Maybe the drive would have stood out more if he hadn't felt so utterly lost.

It's strange that the last time he felt this lost and lonely was the day he found out he was going to be a father. Who'd have known at the time that the reversal of that statement would feel a hundred times worse. The truth was that he was actually looking forward to seeing his daughter for the first time. Seeing her precious face and counting her tiny fingers and toes. Even though he knew Quinn didn't want to keep her he had this feeling that just seeing her and holding her, even for a short time, would make all the heartache and hardships they'd been through the past few months better somehow. Like all the pain and fighting would be worth it just because she had finally entered their world. But now… that's all gone. She's not his daughter anymore. He was the one at the doctors appointments, and he was the one who made midnight ice cream and bacon runs, and he was the one who felt her kick for the first time, but that didn't make him a father… just a fool.

Making his way through the front door he froze. It was as if he'd entered into some sort of a time capsule of a previous life. A world untainted. Nothing felt real, and certainly nothing felt right. The yellow sweater by the door, the newly collected stack of chick magazines on the coffee table and the flowers on the table that she convinced his mom would help freshen up the place, all reminders of _her_… and the life they had started building together.

All mocking him and his misery.

In a wave of nausea Finn decided he couldn't be there when she came home. He couldn't stand seeing her sad face when _he's _the one that's hurting. He couldn't bare seeing her tear stained cheeks and have to resist wrapping her in his arms and telling her that everything's going to be alright. Before he could think about it any longer he turned around and left. He didn't know where his feet were taking him. He just knew that he needed to walk, he needed to be anywhere but there.

He tried to keep his head clear as his feet desperately pounded the sidewalk below but he couldn't seem to stop the images of earlier that day from constantly looping around in his mind.

The feeling of the ground slipping out from under him as he watched Rachel's lips form the words. The sensation of feeling sick and weak as the title of father had been ripped away from him before the realization of what they had done sunk in and the blinding rage hit. The hollow thud of his fists colliding with Puck's skull echoing in his ears and the strangled cries of Rachel calling after him. Hands all over, gripping and pulling him. Mr. Schue yelling. Quinn. His beautiful Quinn crying and nodding and his heart being torn to shreds as everyone stood by and watched.

Suddenly overcome with the urge to vomit, he stopped by the nearest bush and retched until all of the hate and anger had faded, leaving only the hurt, sadness and shadows of what could've been behind.

When he finally returned home hours later he was weary of what he'd find waiting for him. He opened the front door slowly only to find the yellow sweater was gone, as was the stack of Cosmos on the coffee table and the collection of flats she kept by the hallway closet. He smelled his mother's spaghetti sauce simmering on the stove but even after emptying his stomach hours earlier he didn't have the urge to eat. His mom's head poked out from the kitchen when she heard the front door close.

"Honey, where have you been? What's going on? Quinn packed up all of her stuff and left. Did you guys have a fight? All she said was that she was sorry…", she was clearly worried about him because the lines on her forehead were deeper than they usually were but he just couldn't tell her everything was fine and not to worry.

That would be a lie and he was tired of lies.

"I don't want to talk about it Mom."

He hates how weak the words sound, hates how weak he feels.

After telling his mom that he wasn't hungry he excused himself and slowly made his way up the stairs. His mom watched him go with a sad look on her face and told him there would be leftovers if he changed his mind.

He tentatively entered his bedroom and let out a long lingering breath. All of her things were gone. The suitcase that normally sat beside his dresser, the perfume and lotions she had on his nightstand, the slippers she kept by his bed. It was all gone, everything except the spare pillow his mom had lent her and her lingering smell.

That night for the first time Finn unfolded the 'decoy' sleeping bag he'd stashed in his room when Quinn started making her nightly visits a regular thing. He couldn't bring himself to sleep in their bed. He couldn't stand the empty space beside him or the faint aroma of her shampoo that still remained beneath the covers. How many times had she said she loved him under these sheets? How many times did she really mean it?

So instead he crawled into the cold and musty surroundings of the sleeping bag, the smells of past campfires and the familiar tug of his childhood offering him sanctuary from the onslaught of unwelcome thoughts dancing around in his mind. Thoughts of her and Puck and a baby that was no longer his.

It was only then, in the dark and quiet confines of his room, that he allowed himself to let go and shed the tears he'd been holding back all day.

* * *

**AN: Did this make you happy? Did it make you sad? Did it make you want to punch your computer and go cry into a tub of ice cream? Please review and let me know! :) I always appreciate comments. They are more inspiring than you would think!**

**Next up... a confrontation! One that we never did get in canon... so as you can guess from now on I will be going AU. **


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